As far as debilitating disorders go, chronic masturbation, as suffered by Denmark’s Christian VII go, would have to rate among the least serious and debilitating among all ailments. For the average person, such as you or I, you could argue that the biggest problems from jerking it around like it’s your favorite toy would be red eyes, from a lack of sleep, callouses on the hands, and blisters where you really wouldn’t want blisters. But is seems for Christian VII, chronic masturbation was a serious issue. Why you ask? He was the monarch.
Christian VII of Denmark was really quite an odd fellow. Coming to the throne at the young age of 17, which you can argue is too young, he had the weight of the entire nation on his shoulders. But it appears as though he didn’t let it get to him. In fact he placed his regal responsibilities second to his fooling around.
Now while self pleasuring one self is embarrassing to openly discuss, it’s a perfectly natural and healthy activity. But some people become so enamored with the pleasure of it that it becomes a problem. It consumes their entire waking life. Now place a person with such a distraction in a position of authority, where the affairs of the state require a focused mind. You can see the problem, can’t you.
By coming to a position of power at such a tender age, Christian VII’s chronic masturbation presented serious issues for the nation. He had money and power, and he could literally sit around all day long and play with himself. The problem was that he would rather do that than run the country or create an heir. His doctors were so concerned with his preoccupation that they thought he could make himself infertile.
So putting it bluntly, he was a real wanker, and in more ways than one. Apart from playing with it at every opportunity, he behaved in an atrocious manner. During dinners, even with guests present, he would throw food at them. Now food fights at dinner are one thing, but he went even further during conversations. He had a habit of smacking the other person in the face for no apparent reason. He even did it to diplomats.
